Dear Bobo,
I'm using a typewriter, figuring I'll make it easier for our publisher, whoever he may be. Really though, I'm trying to save my writing hand for finals.
Again I must apologize for losing your letter, but I reiterate that I suspect foul play.
You did ask about S's reports about Stonewall. I'm expecting another letter from her tomorrow, but I will give you pertinent excerpts from her last letter. "I sure hope M and Bob straighten things out.....I really don't see why Bob doesn't write to M once in a while. It wouldn't kill him you know, and then she'd be aware that he was at least halfway interested." I also understand that M went to the Follies Ball with Caffine or whatever his name is. According to H, "this amazed quite a few people, but such is life." I'll refrain from making any comments.
Thanks for the suggestion of the questions I should send her through my psychoanalyst, but they lack too much subtlety to please me. And I am trying to be subtle with S.
I'm sending along some literature. Please keep the magazine and return it to me this summer. My article raised quite a storm as you might imagine. The business manager of the Jacko was even going around telling everyone that he had punched me in the mouth. As I told McMahon, I feel like a writer on some reactionary Paris tabloid. I'd suggest that you read the magazine first so that you can really appreciate my review.
I don't think the Ivy League school referred to in your article was Dartmouth. The chaplain has often said that those who do come here and lose their faith really didn't have it before they came. I know many devout Catholics, and I think the atmosphere here can't help but strengthen the faith of a good Catholic.
See you about the fifth, if you're home.
Tom
Saturday, October 5, 2013
Monday, July 15, 2013
May 13, 1958
Dear Thom,
You lost one of my letters! I did not wish to start my letter with that sentence but sometimes I get very emotional. I thought by delaying my reply to your last.......your last.....(sob! slobber!, sniff, sniff.) You must excuse me, sometimes I go all to pieces just thinking about it. I think I'll go to dinner now and finish this when I come back in what I hope will be a calmer state of mind. Excuse me.
Interlude.......soft music......
You lost one of my letters! Fiend! Sadist! Irresponsible Cod! What other insufficient phrases can I heap upon your ungrateful countenance? What can I say? Can your grief, though it undoubtedly exceeds all similar emotions in recorded history in sheer brute intensity, in any way begin to make recompense for the fact that you have lost a document on the par with the Magna Charta, the Ems Dispatch, and Mein Kampf. thou literary B.A. (Benedict Arnold). dost
thou not know that thou hast unleashed a document upon a world completely unprepared for the omnipotent message it contains. Even now some wandering itinerant may be reading it. He will, of course, immediately fall into a state of deep shock brought on by sheer inspiration. I estimate that this condition will last from 3 to 15 years depending on his I.Q., but when he arises on the last day of his coma he will rule the world. The only chance you have for even partial redemption is to scour the countryside indiscriminatelyy slaying all those who appear to be lost in a stupor, drunken or otherwise. I'm sure your frat brothers will assist you in this noble endeavor, although undoubtedly many of them will be the first to lose their lives in your bloody purge.
Since you do have the rest of my letters, I hope, I suppose I have no choice but to overlook your indiscretion, if that is possible. With this thought half-heartedly in mind, I will shift my topic to one of a light nature though no less in immediate importance.
Tough bananas about G, but then they say summer in Okinawa can't be beat, just like city hall.
So you were playing celibate again over Keen Green weekend, and at a party school too, tsk, tsk.
So you're being bothered by thoughts of S, eh, and yet your psychoanalyst tells you that you are enamored with O'Meara. Why don't you get him to send S a word association test - - she'll never catch on. You could make it multiple choice.
Sample Questions:
Pick one letter:
1) Boy
a) Modus........because
b) Busy
c) Tom
d) Mann Act
2) Dartmouth
a) Whoo-Wa_Whoo
b) Tom
c) Mot
d) Loras
3) Date
a) Tom
b) Thomas
c) Thomachura
d) Machu
e) Charles Brown
f) All of the above
4) Sex
a) Boys
b) Girls
c) Tom
d) Pepsi-Cola
e) None of the Above
I hope this helps you in some way.
I've been busy lately what with both the sandwiches and summer storage to sell. On the night of the 13th I sold my 10,000th sandwich and naturally had my picture taken in the process for publicity purposes.
I will send your precious letter back, fear not, although it is still stained slightly with the results of my nausea which I suffered upon reading it.
That's it for now. Write unto me all salient news.
Now, it''s hotter than Sam down here, haven't worn a jacket in days.
Bob - o
You lost one of my letters! I did not wish to start my letter with that sentence but sometimes I get very emotional. I thought by delaying my reply to your last.......your last.....(sob! slobber!, sniff, sniff.) You must excuse me, sometimes I go all to pieces just thinking about it. I think I'll go to dinner now and finish this when I come back in what I hope will be a calmer state of mind. Excuse me.
Interlude.......soft music......
You lost one of my letters! Fiend! Sadist! Irresponsible Cod! What other insufficient phrases can I heap upon your ungrateful countenance? What can I say? Can your grief, though it undoubtedly exceeds all similar emotions in recorded history in sheer brute intensity, in any way begin to make recompense for the fact that you have lost a document on the par with the Magna Charta, the Ems Dispatch, and Mein Kampf. thou literary B.A. (Benedict Arnold). dost
thou not know that thou hast unleashed a document upon a world completely unprepared for the omnipotent message it contains. Even now some wandering itinerant may be reading it. He will, of course, immediately fall into a state of deep shock brought on by sheer inspiration. I estimate that this condition will last from 3 to 15 years depending on his I.Q., but when he arises on the last day of his coma he will rule the world. The only chance you have for even partial redemption is to scour the countryside indiscriminatelyy slaying all those who appear to be lost in a stupor, drunken or otherwise. I'm sure your frat brothers will assist you in this noble endeavor, although undoubtedly many of them will be the first to lose their lives in your bloody purge.
Since you do have the rest of my letters, I hope, I suppose I have no choice but to overlook your indiscretion, if that is possible. With this thought half-heartedly in mind, I will shift my topic to one of a light nature though no less in immediate importance.
Tough bananas about G, but then they say summer in Okinawa can't be beat, just like city hall.
So you were playing celibate again over Keen Green weekend, and at a party school too, tsk, tsk.
So you're being bothered by thoughts of S, eh, and yet your psychoanalyst tells you that you are enamored with O'Meara. Why don't you get him to send S a word association test - - she'll never catch on. You could make it multiple choice.
Sample Questions:
Pick one letter:
1) Boy
a) Modus........because
b) Busy
c) Tom
d) Mann Act
2) Dartmouth
a) Whoo-Wa_Whoo
b) Tom
c) Mot
d) Loras
3) Date
a) Tom
b) Thomas
c) Thomachura
d) Machu
e) Charles Brown
f) All of the above
4) Sex
a) Boys
b) Girls
c) Tom
d) Pepsi-Cola
e) None of the Above
I hope this helps you in some way.
I've been busy lately what with both the sandwiches and summer storage to sell. On the night of the 13th I sold my 10,000th sandwich and naturally had my picture taken in the process for publicity purposes.
I will send your precious letter back, fear not, although it is still stained slightly with the results of my nausea which I suffered upon reading it.
That's it for now. Write unto me all salient news.
Now, it''s hotter than Sam down here, haven't worn a jacket in days.
Bob - o
Saturday, June 15, 2013
May 6, 1958
Dear Bob,
I fear some evil spirit is at work to thwart us in our plans to publish our letters. First he visited you and made you forget to date a letter, completely destroying the chronological significance of that letter.
He then visited both of us in turn and compelled us to set down in writing things which could only be sold with a paper back and a picture of a maiden with a torn bra on the cover.
Still not satisfied, he visited me this weekend and made off with your most recent letter, And to think such penetrating literature is to be lost forever to the outside world!
I'm very ashamed of my carelessness, and in the future I shall make it a point to put your letters under lock and key, I'd advise you to lock your door at night too.
And I have been exchanging very passionate letters - - concerned mainly with you and MM. I almost came home last weekend, but no rides were available. G will be home and he's leaving a few days before I get home for summer vacation. He's going to Okinawa, and I probably won't get another opportunity to see him for a year or two.
Another reason for my going home was, of course, to see S. This will be our big spring weekend here, and I still don't know what I'm going to do. I may go to Boston, New York, the mountains, or just sit here and get "shitfased".
I've been very lazy lately and have been muchly bothered by thoughts of S. I need some sort of break in the monotony before finals.
I still haven't applied to the U. of Vienna and personally I think I'm "nutz", for even thinking of it. But I can dream, can't I? And I've been dreaming quite a bit lately .
The letter I wrote S last Sunday was quite a novel thing in that before I wrote it I consulted with a psychology major and was given his opinion on how to handle her. Her answer should prove very interesting. At the same time the junior psychiastrist gave me a word-association test and proved that subconsciously I am in love with O'Meara. At least my conscious was glad to find out!
Tom
I fear some evil spirit is at work to thwart us in our plans to publish our letters. First he visited you and made you forget to date a letter, completely destroying the chronological significance of that letter.
He then visited both of us in turn and compelled us to set down in writing things which could only be sold with a paper back and a picture of a maiden with a torn bra on the cover.
Still not satisfied, he visited me this weekend and made off with your most recent letter, And to think such penetrating literature is to be lost forever to the outside world!
I'm very ashamed of my carelessness, and in the future I shall make it a point to put your letters under lock and key, I'd advise you to lock your door at night too.
And I have been exchanging very passionate letters - - concerned mainly with you and MM. I almost came home last weekend, but no rides were available. G will be home and he's leaving a few days before I get home for summer vacation. He's going to Okinawa, and I probably won't get another opportunity to see him for a year or two.
Another reason for my going home was, of course, to see S. This will be our big spring weekend here, and I still don't know what I'm going to do. I may go to Boston, New York, the mountains, or just sit here and get "shitfased".
I've been very lazy lately and have been muchly bothered by thoughts of S. I need some sort of break in the monotony before finals.
I still haven't applied to the U. of Vienna and personally I think I'm "nutz", for even thinking of it. But I can dream, can't I? And I've been dreaming quite a bit lately .
The letter I wrote S last Sunday was quite a novel thing in that before I wrote it I consulted with a psychology major and was given his opinion on how to handle her. Her answer should prove very interesting. At the same time the junior psychiastrist gave me a word-association test and proved that subconsciously I am in love with O'Meara. At least my conscious was glad to find out!
Tom
Thursday, June 6, 2013
April 17, 1958
Dear Thom,
Your letter came Tuesday as a very pleasant surprise. I wasn't expecting any mail and I didn't even look in the box, but one of my associates, Ed Kearse of Binghamton, N.Y. by name (we call him Ed Kearse for short) informed me that there was a letter in my box. If it hadn't been for Krause, I still would not have found your transcript so send him a note of thanks when you have the time.
So much for the banalities. I think your timely gift to S was an excellent idea. At least your purchase will help to alleviate the recession. As for your "snow campaign" I think S is more than sufficiently snowed, and, unless you are contemplating an early marriage, I suggest you park the plow and wait until she digs herself out. With the price of shotgun shells dropping day by day one must constantly be on one's guard lest parental justice exact its terrible toll.
Your studies concerning both the size and relationship of S's anatomical concavitures and convexities, one to another, show an astute application on your part of all the complexities of that interesting theory propounded by Messer. Braile long these many years. It is reassuring to see that modern youth has not entirely disregarded the past achievement of our forebearers, but rather in some cases has improved upon them.
Tomachura, I salute you! Take your place with H as student of the month.
We had better not publish these things after all, the references are too pointed.
H has to work at the stand again this summer due to recession. Last Sunday, April 13, he had to open up for the smelt fisherman. Pissed him off.
Bob
Your letter came Tuesday as a very pleasant surprise. I wasn't expecting any mail and I didn't even look in the box, but one of my associates, Ed Kearse of Binghamton, N.Y. by name (we call him Ed Kearse for short) informed me that there was a letter in my box. If it hadn't been for Krause, I still would not have found your transcript so send him a note of thanks when you have the time.
So much for the banalities. I think your timely gift to S was an excellent idea. At least your purchase will help to alleviate the recession. As for your "snow campaign" I think S is more than sufficiently snowed, and, unless you are contemplating an early marriage, I suggest you park the plow and wait until she digs herself out. With the price of shotgun shells dropping day by day one must constantly be on one's guard lest parental justice exact its terrible toll.
Your studies concerning both the size and relationship of S's anatomical concavitures and convexities, one to another, show an astute application on your part of all the complexities of that interesting theory propounded by Messer. Braile long these many years. It is reassuring to see that modern youth has not entirely disregarded the past achievement of our forebearers, but rather in some cases has improved upon them.
Tomachura, I salute you! Take your place with H as student of the month.
We had better not publish these things after all, the references are too pointed.
H has to work at the stand again this summer due to recession. Last Sunday, April 13, he had to open up for the smelt fisherman. Pissed him off.
Bob
Thursday, May 16, 2013
April 13, 1958
Dear Bobo,
I've been back at school less than a week, but already I'm looking forward to coming home at summer time.
I wrote S a letter the day i got back, but as yet she hasn't answered it. Her birthday is Tuesday, and I'm going to send her a recording by the Injunaires - - a singing group made up of members of the Dartmouth Glee Club. I'm sure H would find such an action very improper, but I feel it is a necessary part of my "snow" campaign.
Last night being Saturday night, I spent it in typical Dartmouth fashion with a quart and a half of beer. A friend of mine and I sat in my room listening to such "horn-producing" records as "Songs for Swinging Lovers" by Frank Sinatra, and we were both pretty "horny" by the time the beer was gone.
Today was a beautiful day, though, and I'm planning to take a little hike later in the day along the river. Maybe Nature's charm will help me forget someone else's charm.
I think S should look pretty good in a bathing suit this summer. From dancing with her and just observing in general, I know she is rather amply supplied with the measurement which is uppermost in men's minds.
An when I danced with her, I was able to put my arm all the way around to the right side of her waist. And she also had very nice hips. All that's left is the leg section, and we'll find out about that this summer.
I think M is a really nice girl except for the deadly, icy looks she is wont to give me. It's going to be a long, long spring.
Tom
I've been back at school less than a week, but already I'm looking forward to coming home at summer time.
I wrote S a letter the day i got back, but as yet she hasn't answered it. Her birthday is Tuesday, and I'm going to send her a recording by the Injunaires - - a singing group made up of members of the Dartmouth Glee Club. I'm sure H would find such an action very improper, but I feel it is a necessary part of my "snow" campaign.
Last night being Saturday night, I spent it in typical Dartmouth fashion with a quart and a half of beer. A friend of mine and I sat in my room listening to such "horn-producing" records as "Songs for Swinging Lovers" by Frank Sinatra, and we were both pretty "horny" by the time the beer was gone.
Today was a beautiful day, though, and I'm planning to take a little hike later in the day along the river. Maybe Nature's charm will help me forget someone else's charm.
I think S should look pretty good in a bathing suit this summer. From dancing with her and just observing in general, I know she is rather amply supplied with the measurement which is uppermost in men's minds.
An when I danced with her, I was able to put my arm all the way around to the right side of her waist. And she also had very nice hips. All that's left is the leg section, and we'll find out about that this summer.
I think M is a really nice girl except for the deadly, icy looks she is wont to give me. It's going to be a long, long spring.
Tom
Monday, May 13, 2013
March 10, 1958
Dear Thom,
Things are now very confused. I mean "like wow!"
To begin with we might get off early for Easter due to the spectacular success of our basketball team. This is only a rumor as yet, which has neither been confirmed nor denied by the faculty. If this rumor proves to be true, I will leave for home on Saturday, March 29. Whether or not this occurs will undoubtedly depend on how far the team goes in the N.C.A.A.; therefore I probably will not know for sure exactly when I will be able to come home until a week before, or the weekend you leave for home, but even if we don't go all the way they might give it to us anyway. Nobody knows or else nobody's talking.
What all this is leading up to is that it would not be wise for you to attempt any visitation at that particular time. The week before vacation is always hell around here, because all the profs give gigantic exams on the theory that they can correct them over the holidays at their leisure. After the week before vacation, you really need the vacation. Also, because it is right before vacation, no one is going home and leaving his room vacant where you could stay. Even if someone wanted to he couldn't leave this place early. The rule states that everyone, dean's list or not, must attend the last class in every subject. This means no vacant rooms and no unused meal cards. This place is no state school and they clamp down on the rule. Just before they turn us loose, we have a pep talk telling us to behave like Christian gentlemen, etc. Then too everyone is running around like mad packing, getting their plane reservations, locating rides, etc. However, there are still three weeks left before March 29 and if anything turns up I'll let you know immediately. Right now I am just recovering from the first big batch of tests of the semester and I am now girding myself for the mid-semester exams which are coming up this week. Then I will have another week's rest and the Easter exams will be upon me.
So S hasn't written yet. I told you she might drift if you snowed her too much.
As for K, snowing her is not the heights to which my ambition rises. If I get stuck with her this summer, I shall feel very ill used.
I doubt if we'll every get S or MM to the beach as neither one knows how to swim. Maybe you could get S to go, but MM would no doubt rather die than betray herself in a swim suit.
I didn't mind when H told me he was going to take MM out because 1) I knew she would be dating others and 2) as long as she has to date some one, there is no one I'd rather have her date than H. If she ever gets back with JD again, I might as well apply for overseas duty.
I have to write her about that Easter dance soon and I have a feeling that I won't receive a reply. The only thing worse than a "Dear John" letter is no letter at all. It's so easy for a girl not to answer a letter. It pisses me off. That's what it does.
Don't let my first page discourage you too much. I will keep my eyes and ears open for possible accommodations for you. I just don't want you to get you hopes high and then have to break the bad news. A lot can happen in three weeks. S may write, who knows, anything can happen. H might even elope with MM.
I've got to cut this jazz now and do my Physics. Let me know if you've got any good news about anything in general.
I feel in a very defectory mood about everything in general, especially about Physics. The only bright spot around here is that everyone is breaking their Lenten resolutions and buying sandwiches.
Will Easter never come!!? "Life's but a moving shadow. A poor player who struts his hour upon the stage and is seen no more."
What affects me the most about these lines is that MM can't even faintly remember them, and yet she studied the whole damn play.
Maybe Jimmy Gawne was right after all. English departments in our schools are definitely lacking.
Will Easter never, never, come!? Anon, anon, forsooth!
Bob
Spring Humoresque:
Spring has sprung. The bird is on the wing.
But to MM, it doesn't mean a thing.
Cultural poetry just leaves her dead,
And poor Macbeth was wastefully read.
Her aggregate knowledge of Lindsey and Chaucer
And all the rest, could reside in a saucer.
Her complete impotence in intellectual art,
Is a wedge that forces us miles apart.
Full long I have striven to drive that wedge out,
But there's nothing I know that she'll talk about.
Yet, despite her abominable taciturn feature,
I must admit she's a cute little creature.
And though it is foolish, I suppose I'll not swerve,
From my efforts to breach her fair walls of reserve,
But the thing that annoys me and pisses me off,
The thing that I hate as a giraffe hates a cough - - (terrible metaphor).
Should I in the future, her battlements breach,
And she stands there defenseless and well within reach,
With the battle now won, and the prey being caught,
I'll finally be certain she's as witless as I thought.
So in winning the battle, but losing the war,
I doubt very much if I'll come back for more.
And as penance supreme for my actions imprudent,
I'll join Tom Mac as a professional student.
Finis
You used to nauseate me with your C poems. Now i can nauseate you with odes to MM.
Bob
e
Things are now very confused. I mean "like wow!"
To begin with we might get off early for Easter due to the spectacular success of our basketball team. This is only a rumor as yet, which has neither been confirmed nor denied by the faculty. If this rumor proves to be true, I will leave for home on Saturday, March 29. Whether or not this occurs will undoubtedly depend on how far the team goes in the N.C.A.A.; therefore I probably will not know for sure exactly when I will be able to come home until a week before, or the weekend you leave for home, but even if we don't go all the way they might give it to us anyway. Nobody knows or else nobody's talking.
What all this is leading up to is that it would not be wise for you to attempt any visitation at that particular time. The week before vacation is always hell around here, because all the profs give gigantic exams on the theory that they can correct them over the holidays at their leisure. After the week before vacation, you really need the vacation. Also, because it is right before vacation, no one is going home and leaving his room vacant where you could stay. Even if someone wanted to he couldn't leave this place early. The rule states that everyone, dean's list or not, must attend the last class in every subject. This means no vacant rooms and no unused meal cards. This place is no state school and they clamp down on the rule. Just before they turn us loose, we have a pep talk telling us to behave like Christian gentlemen, etc. Then too everyone is running around like mad packing, getting their plane reservations, locating rides, etc. However, there are still three weeks left before March 29 and if anything turns up I'll let you know immediately. Right now I am just recovering from the first big batch of tests of the semester and I am now girding myself for the mid-semester exams which are coming up this week. Then I will have another week's rest and the Easter exams will be upon me.
So S hasn't written yet. I told you she might drift if you snowed her too much.
As for K, snowing her is not the heights to which my ambition rises. If I get stuck with her this summer, I shall feel very ill used.
I doubt if we'll every get S or MM to the beach as neither one knows how to swim. Maybe you could get S to go, but MM would no doubt rather die than betray herself in a swim suit.
I didn't mind when H told me he was going to take MM out because 1) I knew she would be dating others and 2) as long as she has to date some one, there is no one I'd rather have her date than H. If she ever gets back with JD again, I might as well apply for overseas duty.
I have to write her about that Easter dance soon and I have a feeling that I won't receive a reply. The only thing worse than a "Dear John" letter is no letter at all. It's so easy for a girl not to answer a letter. It pisses me off. That's what it does.
Don't let my first page discourage you too much. I will keep my eyes and ears open for possible accommodations for you. I just don't want you to get you hopes high and then have to break the bad news. A lot can happen in three weeks. S may write, who knows, anything can happen. H might even elope with MM.
I've got to cut this jazz now and do my Physics. Let me know if you've got any good news about anything in general.
I feel in a very defectory mood about everything in general, especially about Physics. The only bright spot around here is that everyone is breaking their Lenten resolutions and buying sandwiches.
Will Easter never come!!? "Life's but a moving shadow. A poor player who struts his hour upon the stage and is seen no more."
What affects me the most about these lines is that MM can't even faintly remember them, and yet she studied the whole damn play.
Maybe Jimmy Gawne was right after all. English departments in our schools are definitely lacking.
Will Easter never, never, come!? Anon, anon, forsooth!
Bob
Spring Humoresque:
Spring has sprung. The bird is on the wing.
But to MM, it doesn't mean a thing.
Cultural poetry just leaves her dead,
And poor Macbeth was wastefully read.
Her aggregate knowledge of Lindsey and Chaucer
And all the rest, could reside in a saucer.
Her complete impotence in intellectual art,
Is a wedge that forces us miles apart.
Full long I have striven to drive that wedge out,
But there's nothing I know that she'll talk about.
Yet, despite her abominable taciturn feature,
I must admit she's a cute little creature.
And though it is foolish, I suppose I'll not swerve,
From my efforts to breach her fair walls of reserve,
But the thing that annoys me and pisses me off,
The thing that I hate as a giraffe hates a cough - - (terrible metaphor).
Should I in the future, her battlements breach,
And she stands there defenseless and well within reach,
With the battle now won, and the prey being caught,
I'll finally be certain she's as witless as I thought.
So in winning the battle, but losing the war,
I doubt very much if I'll come back for more.
And as penance supreme for my actions imprudent,
I'll join Tom Mac as a professional student.
Finis
You used to nauseate me with your C poems. Now i can nauseate you with odes to MM.
Bob
e
Saturday, April 13, 2013
March 2, 1958
Dear Bob,
I'm afraid I sort of take it in the ear as far as spring vacation is concerned. Our vacation isn't planned in reference to Easter, but rather to the length of the semester.
Our vacation begins March 22. I should get home on the 23rd, Sunday, if I do come home. Classes resume Tuesday, April 8, which means I'll have to leave home Easter Sunday most likely. the Dartmouth Glee Club concert is April 3, Holy Thursday. I don't know if S will want to go to it, or not on that date. I see you won't be home until April 2, which means we wouldn't see much of each other because of the Holy Week.
As you can see, my entire vacation falls within Lent, so I probably won't have any dates (except for the concert which I'm going to try to talk S into attending). And nobody is out as early as I am, so it looks as if all I'll do at home is study. The situation is very depressing and I really don't feel like going home at all.
If I can get a ride, I'll come home, for I'd like to set up a job for the summer and see S at least once.
Since there is really nothing to attract me at home, I was thinking that perhaps I could some and see you for a few days at the beginning of the vacation. I don't know if you're allowed to let people sleep in your room, but I could sack out on a couch or something. I know I couldn't afford to stay in town in a hotel or the like. If the idea appeals to you and you think you can handle it, I think we could have a great time. I'd probably get there sometime Sunday and would stay 'til Tuesday or so. Let me know how you feel about it.
Moving on to more pleasant topics - - contemplation of the coming summer.
It looks like you have K completely "snowed". P mentions her more than she mentions herself. Could this be a budding romance? I think we will be seeing a lot of them this summer, unless P doesn't return the dog tag.
I've been playing a lot of "hearts" lately, and have become quite good at it. ( I won 46 cents last night.)
I think that this summer we might try the college section of the beach, and we might even teach P and K to play bridge!
This summer should really be interesting for I'm going to try and talk S into coming there (the beach). Who knows, even MM might come.
And speaking of the small but variable quantity, I might mention that H has decided to "heed my counsel and not go out with MM". He points out, however, that 1) she's been going out with other boys and 2) you didn't seem to mind when he told you his plans.
I think you might at least thank me for protecting your squatter's rights even if you don't want to squat!
The next time you write MM tell her if S doesn't write soon I'm going to get really P.O.'d. It's been 2 weeks since her last letter.
Tom
P.S. My 3.8 means .2 below a B average.
I'm afraid I sort of take it in the ear as far as spring vacation is concerned. Our vacation isn't planned in reference to Easter, but rather to the length of the semester.
Our vacation begins March 22. I should get home on the 23rd, Sunday, if I do come home. Classes resume Tuesday, April 8, which means I'll have to leave home Easter Sunday most likely. the Dartmouth Glee Club concert is April 3, Holy Thursday. I don't know if S will want to go to it, or not on that date. I see you won't be home until April 2, which means we wouldn't see much of each other because of the Holy Week.
As you can see, my entire vacation falls within Lent, so I probably won't have any dates (except for the concert which I'm going to try to talk S into attending). And nobody is out as early as I am, so it looks as if all I'll do at home is study. The situation is very depressing and I really don't feel like going home at all.
If I can get a ride, I'll come home, for I'd like to set up a job for the summer and see S at least once.
Since there is really nothing to attract me at home, I was thinking that perhaps I could some and see you for a few days at the beginning of the vacation. I don't know if you're allowed to let people sleep in your room, but I could sack out on a couch or something. I know I couldn't afford to stay in town in a hotel or the like. If the idea appeals to you and you think you can handle it, I think we could have a great time. I'd probably get there sometime Sunday and would stay 'til Tuesday or so. Let me know how you feel about it.
Moving on to more pleasant topics - - contemplation of the coming summer.
It looks like you have K completely "snowed". P mentions her more than she mentions herself. Could this be a budding romance? I think we will be seeing a lot of them this summer, unless P doesn't return the dog tag.
I've been playing a lot of "hearts" lately, and have become quite good at it. ( I won 46 cents last night.)
I think that this summer we might try the college section of the beach, and we might even teach P and K to play bridge!
This summer should really be interesting for I'm going to try and talk S into coming there (the beach). Who knows, even MM might come.
And speaking of the small but variable quantity, I might mention that H has decided to "heed my counsel and not go out with MM". He points out, however, that 1) she's been going out with other boys and 2) you didn't seem to mind when he told you his plans.
I think you might at least thank me for protecting your squatter's rights even if you don't want to squat!
The next time you write MM tell her if S doesn't write soon I'm going to get really P.O.'d. It's been 2 weeks since her last letter.
Tom
P.S. My 3.8 means .2 below a B average.
Tuesday, April 2, 2013
Feb. 19, 1958
Dear Thom,
Well Stranger, I think I'd better write you now before Easter comes any closer. I couldn't figure out why you wrote your last letter in red ink until your last line when you objected to my inferring that you were conservative. At least you must admit I have never written any letters entirely in red ink.
I suppose I had better tackle the subject of P immediately, although I usually save the girls until last. I also have one of her letters which I will send you along with the others. You can draw your own comparisons from them.
They are both written on the same paper, however, you rated the ink while I had to be content with pencil. She wrote my letter on three single-sided sheets mainly I think because I wrote her on single-sided sheets.
Her writing has changed some between the two letters. It seems to have become more "worldly". Notice her slanted T's in your letter as compared to the straight "wholesome" T's in my letter? I think she was trying to impress you especially since her T's tend to straighten out as her letter went on.
As to her mental capacity, I do feel that we have underrated her, or rather I feel that my first impression of her was correct. Naturally I was inclined to be bitter about the whole thing, when I was traded in for a dog tag. However, that is neither here nor there. I am sue P will make a pretty, clever, and charming addition to our Summer Card Club, but other than that I cannot revive a vestige of my former interest in her.
You, however, I am sure will do much better than I did. This is more or less a truism. If you do anything, you will do better than I did.
I agree with you that this coming summer should indeed be an interesting one. Do you think we should move into the college section of the beach? We've been camping on that one bit of sand for so long now that we're sort of an old established firm. Our "customers" will be at a loss as to where to find us. Of course we could pull up stakes altogether and go to Saugatuck for the summer; howsomever, since I failed to win not only one car but two, I think that Saugatuck is out of the question as a regular thing unless we can get hold of a regular feller who can get hold of a car regularly. H is going to work on a construction job next summer on weekdays and at Shay's on Sundays and holidays.
This may well cause him to forfeit MM (may well, implying a distinct possibility).
As to H's refusing to leave his books to take MM out, you're probably more right than wrong. He just doesn't care that much how the other side of the Freud theory lives, if indeed it lives at all in his estimation.
I see where you're concerned about flunking, and I also see that P does not share your concern. What the hell does a 3.8 on a 5pt. system mean? Can't you say 85 or 75 or something like that? I myself received a 22.3 rating on the omega curve grading norm. That is approximately 85.14 of 100% This could also possible be construed a being a B average, but I wouldn't if I were you.
H and some friends (maybe) are coming down here on Feb. 28 to witness a N.D. basketball game. I wrote him about a week ago to give me a definite answer as to what his plans were. As he did not answer promptly enough, I sen him a Scholastic and a poem the same night I mailed your last Scholastic.
The poem went as follows:
Send me a letter concerning the game.
Let me in on your nebulous plans.
And don't tell me that - - on this night of all nights,
You have to work at one of Willie Shay's stands.
Come by bus or by plane,
But to come don't refrain.
If you must, take the old C.T.A.
Come alone or with a crowd,
Any number's allowed,
If with the latter, please bring M.M.K.
I've not heard from him as yet, but that should get a rise out of him anyway.
Now I must bring up yet another subject. My Easter vacation begins on Wed., April 2 (that will be my first full day home) and ends on Sunday, April 13. The 7th, the 11th and the 12th are the only days during which we will be able to take out any girls due to the frequent meetings of the J.C. fan club ( oh sacrilegious sacrilege). Maybe I',m old-fashioned , but I think inter-sex activities are frowned upon during holy week at least by parents if not by offspring.
On Friday I hope to take MM to the Chi. Club dance. That leaves Monday and Saturday. Now here is what I suggest. I have gotten a hold of a car in the name of G. With this car we can take the girls bowling on Monday; however G having become deeply enamored by my tales of B wants to forsake N for a night and take her out.
Of this I heartily approve. In other words I don't give a damn as long as we've got a car. I'm funny that way.
Contingent problems:
How shall we go about arranging this? How soon before the date shall we notify G's intended? Will she go? all of this of course depends, as far as I;m concerned, on that tiny but determining variable, namely MM. Perhaps she is no longer responsive to my passionate advances. I'm now laboring under the delusion that she once was.
At any rate, send me a schedule of you "at home" games (Easter vacation) and include the date of the Dartmouth concert. By the time you get this we will still have five weeks until Easter, but I believe in settling things ahead of time.
Better stop "snowing" S, her interest may "drift".
Speaking of snow, it has been doing it every day since Feb. 3. Today is the first clear, snowless day since then.
Watch out for a freshman uprising in the form of another "Dirtmouth".
I enjoyed your articles, especially M. Morningstar, but the weather report on the other side of the page was even better. The poems were very good.
Send my P letter back as soon as you can, because the shrine looks bare without it.
Bob
Well Stranger, I think I'd better write you now before Easter comes any closer. I couldn't figure out why you wrote your last letter in red ink until your last line when you objected to my inferring that you were conservative. At least you must admit I have never written any letters entirely in red ink.
I suppose I had better tackle the subject of P immediately, although I usually save the girls until last. I also have one of her letters which I will send you along with the others. You can draw your own comparisons from them.
They are both written on the same paper, however, you rated the ink while I had to be content with pencil. She wrote my letter on three single-sided sheets mainly I think because I wrote her on single-sided sheets.
Her writing has changed some between the two letters. It seems to have become more "worldly". Notice her slanted T's in your letter as compared to the straight "wholesome" T's in my letter? I think she was trying to impress you especially since her T's tend to straighten out as her letter went on.
As to her mental capacity, I do feel that we have underrated her, or rather I feel that my first impression of her was correct. Naturally I was inclined to be bitter about the whole thing, when I was traded in for a dog tag. However, that is neither here nor there. I am sue P will make a pretty, clever, and charming addition to our Summer Card Club, but other than that I cannot revive a vestige of my former interest in her.
You, however, I am sure will do much better than I did. This is more or less a truism. If you do anything, you will do better than I did.
I agree with you that this coming summer should indeed be an interesting one. Do you think we should move into the college section of the beach? We've been camping on that one bit of sand for so long now that we're sort of an old established firm. Our "customers" will be at a loss as to where to find us. Of course we could pull up stakes altogether and go to Saugatuck for the summer; howsomever, since I failed to win not only one car but two, I think that Saugatuck is out of the question as a regular thing unless we can get hold of a regular feller who can get hold of a car regularly. H is going to work on a construction job next summer on weekdays and at Shay's on Sundays and holidays.
This may well cause him to forfeit MM (may well, implying a distinct possibility).
As to H's refusing to leave his books to take MM out, you're probably more right than wrong. He just doesn't care that much how the other side of the Freud theory lives, if indeed it lives at all in his estimation.
I see where you're concerned about flunking, and I also see that P does not share your concern. What the hell does a 3.8 on a 5pt. system mean? Can't you say 85 or 75 or something like that? I myself received a 22.3 rating on the omega curve grading norm. That is approximately 85.14 of 100% This could also possible be construed a being a B average, but I wouldn't if I were you.
H and some friends (maybe) are coming down here on Feb. 28 to witness a N.D. basketball game. I wrote him about a week ago to give me a definite answer as to what his plans were. As he did not answer promptly enough, I sen him a Scholastic and a poem the same night I mailed your last Scholastic.
The poem went as follows:
Send me a letter concerning the game.
Let me in on your nebulous plans.
And don't tell me that - - on this night of all nights,
You have to work at one of Willie Shay's stands.
Come by bus or by plane,
But to come don't refrain.
If you must, take the old C.T.A.
Come alone or with a crowd,
Any number's allowed,
If with the latter, please bring M.M.K.
I've not heard from him as yet, but that should get a rise out of him anyway.
Now I must bring up yet another subject. My Easter vacation begins on Wed., April 2 (that will be my first full day home) and ends on Sunday, April 13. The 7th, the 11th and the 12th are the only days during which we will be able to take out any girls due to the frequent meetings of the J.C. fan club ( oh sacrilegious sacrilege). Maybe I',m old-fashioned , but I think inter-sex activities are frowned upon during holy week at least by parents if not by offspring.
On Friday I hope to take MM to the Chi. Club dance. That leaves Monday and Saturday. Now here is what I suggest. I have gotten a hold of a car in the name of G. With this car we can take the girls bowling on Monday; however G having become deeply enamored by my tales of B wants to forsake N for a night and take her out.
Of this I heartily approve. In other words I don't give a damn as long as we've got a car. I'm funny that way.
Contingent problems:
How shall we go about arranging this? How soon before the date shall we notify G's intended? Will she go? all of this of course depends, as far as I;m concerned, on that tiny but determining variable, namely MM. Perhaps she is no longer responsive to my passionate advances. I'm now laboring under the delusion that she once was.
At any rate, send me a schedule of you "at home" games (Easter vacation) and include the date of the Dartmouth concert. By the time you get this we will still have five weeks until Easter, but I believe in settling things ahead of time.
Better stop "snowing" S, her interest may "drift".
Speaking of snow, it has been doing it every day since Feb. 3. Today is the first clear, snowless day since then.
Watch out for a freshman uprising in the form of another "Dirtmouth".
I enjoyed your articles, especially M. Morningstar, but the weather report on the other side of the page was even better. The poems were very good.
Send my P letter back as soon as you can, because the shrine looks bare without it.
Bob
Saturday, February 23, 2013
Feb. 5, 1958
Dear Bob,
Before I begin, I'd like to ask you to return at your earliest convenience the original of my letter to P. I want to see what I wrote before I write her again. I am enclosing the letter which she sent me in return. I shall now make observations on the answer she sent me.
First of all, it was sent me in an IC envelope, and as you can see, it is written on stenographer's paper. She uses "sincerely" at the conclusion and uses her full name.
This would indicate to me that she didn't put much thought into the letter, and her formal ending indicates that our relationship is just that - - formal. Of course, I also used my full name in my letter, but I was afraid she wouldn't remember my last name and be able to send her answer.
Also note the capital letter in "Stranger", as if I were the one stranger in her life.
The whole theme of her letter rather surprises me. Her answer might lead someone to believe that I had written a nice little hello note to her.
I expected her to write an answer that was either warmly passionate or painfully sarcastic. I find this one neither. It seems too innocent. There's still a chance that she is smarter than either of us thinks. Certainly the second paragraph of her letter should have resulted in the lowering of my defenses. I'm afraid that now I am the one who can't quite figure out her tactics. This should be quite an interesting summer, and I'm sort of glad our Brussels deal didn't materialize.
I would also appreciate it if you returned the enclosed letter, but there's no hurry. I'm not going to write her until I get the letter back, and I think my strategy calls for my leaving her hanging by her thumbs for a while. This has seemed to work all right in the past.
I'm glad your interest in MM has been revived, I always maintained that she has the cutest face I've ever seen. I feel I must warn you, however, that H has designs on her, and I'm sure unethical as he is, he won't hesitate to take advantage of his geographical proximity to her.
I've written S another letter. So far, she's accepted my invitation to go to the Dartmouth Glee Club Concert this spring. I made the letter fairly "snowy" and I'm anxiously awaiting her answer.
Events here at school have been much less interesting and intriguing. I got a 3.8 (on the 5-point system) last semester. This semester will be very difficult, and I'm worried about flunking out.
Winter Carnival came off last weekend, and I had a pretty wild time with the sister of one of my brothers. I'm afraid that's the last girl I'll see until spring vacation.
Potpourri:
Who said our habits are conservative?
Prediction.: H won't leave his books to take out MM.
Tom
Before I begin, I'd like to ask you to return at your earliest convenience the original of my letter to P. I want to see what I wrote before I write her again. I am enclosing the letter which she sent me in return. I shall now make observations on the answer she sent me.
First of all, it was sent me in an IC envelope, and as you can see, it is written on stenographer's paper. She uses "sincerely" at the conclusion and uses her full name.
This would indicate to me that she didn't put much thought into the letter, and her formal ending indicates that our relationship is just that - - formal. Of course, I also used my full name in my letter, but I was afraid she wouldn't remember my last name and be able to send her answer.
Also note the capital letter in "Stranger", as if I were the one stranger in her life.
The whole theme of her letter rather surprises me. Her answer might lead someone to believe that I had written a nice little hello note to her.
I expected her to write an answer that was either warmly passionate or painfully sarcastic. I find this one neither. It seems too innocent. There's still a chance that she is smarter than either of us thinks. Certainly the second paragraph of her letter should have resulted in the lowering of my defenses. I'm afraid that now I am the one who can't quite figure out her tactics. This should be quite an interesting summer, and I'm sort of glad our Brussels deal didn't materialize.
I would also appreciate it if you returned the enclosed letter, but there's no hurry. I'm not going to write her until I get the letter back, and I think my strategy calls for my leaving her hanging by her thumbs for a while. This has seemed to work all right in the past.
I'm glad your interest in MM has been revived, I always maintained that she has the cutest face I've ever seen. I feel I must warn you, however, that H has designs on her, and I'm sure unethical as he is, he won't hesitate to take advantage of his geographical proximity to her.
I've written S another letter. So far, she's accepted my invitation to go to the Dartmouth Glee Club Concert this spring. I made the letter fairly "snowy" and I'm anxiously awaiting her answer.
Events here at school have been much less interesting and intriguing. I got a 3.8 (on the 5-point system) last semester. This semester will be very difficult, and I'm worried about flunking out.
Winter Carnival came off last weekend, and I had a pretty wild time with the sister of one of my brothers. I'm afraid that's the last girl I'll see until spring vacation.
Potpourri:
Who said our habits are conservative?
Prediction.: H won't leave his books to take out MM.
Tom
Thursday, January 31, 2013
Jan. 30, 1958
Dear Thom,
There's a lot to be said in this letter. I'll probably forget most of it before I get through.
The fellow next door, inspired by your Ivy magazine about Frisbee which I showed him, brought 2 wimpleplots with him when he came back from Xmas. A couple of days later about seven revelers were cavorting with the wimpleplots in the 4th floor corridor. The were perceived by the 4th floor prefect and were unceremoniously ejected from the hall. This meant that they had to leave the hall at 6AM each morning and return at 12AM each night until further notice. They were in exile for two days. I don't think Frisbee is going to go over too big down here. Maybe we are deemphasizing sports, I don't know. At any rate, the exiled became ensanguine martyrs, and clandestine plans are being formed for springtime Frisbee meets with Lyons hall. What will come of this I don't know. It has already gotten beyond me.
My grades are about the same. I guess I've hit my peak. The Dean's list 88 is a good three points above my 85 ( a mark in which I am becoming entrenched with each passing semester).
At Carmel everything was 90. Here everything is 85. What a rut!
Your letter to P was quite (and here I am at a decided loss for an adequate word). It was expressive of fond emotion, unique, and a definite departure from our usual conservative habits or perhaps it wasn't. We both seem to be making severe departures from out usual conservative habits as of late; e,g, the fatal phone call.
If she's smart, she won't answer it. With this in mind, I am sure you have received an answer by now. I can't see how she can answer it and not place herself at a disadvantage in doing so; however, most girls, being mediocre logicians at best can't resist retorting to such a letter unless it frightened her, but then P doesn't scare easily. Your pointed reference to the abnormal and undesirable cell division and reorientation of her latter extremities should excite her curiosity if nothing else. The more I look at your letter the more sure I am that you will receive an answer, at least a summons. But enough of P for P has enough of butt.
I took MM out last Friday and had a reasonable time. As usual she was taciturn, but not as much as usual.
The evening was a debacle in some respects, but Bart....., you remember him and his cool music, pulled it out of the fire. He's a good organizer and I'm glad I doubled with him. Because of G, we were and hour late, and there were no tables when we finally arrived. Bart, somehow found one somewhere and bribed the waiter for another one. Our group on the whole was very lively and a good time was available to all who extended themselves a bit. As usual, I don't know if MM had a good time or not.
If you are still writing to S, you can probably find out more than I can. Those two are thick as thieves. That much I found out. The one point in the evening at which MM showed some definite interest in what I was saying occurred thusly.
Bob: "Tom told me in his last letter that he wrote S"
MM: "Yes, I know"
Bob: "He said that .. ah..ah... lets see..ah"
MM: !!! "Yes" !!!
Her interested tone startled me, and I immediatetly threw up my defenses and withdrew from the subject. I found out a little more about her and S too. They are both going to attend Clark College. Of course you know where that is. Just in case you might have forgotten, it is located in Dubuque, IA and is affiliated with Loras the same way that St. Mary's is affiliated with ND.
When I asked MM how long her Home Econ course would take she blatantly replied that you could stay as long as you wanted, and she didn't really care if she got a degree or not. She is then, a typical female college student taking her pre-marital course and the sooner she graduates the better.
I personally was not overly impressed; however, and this did surprise me, when I got back to ND about 15 of my close friends who were at the dance and who got a good look at MM questioned me as to where and how I found such a "pretty little number", and if I was "going steady" with her, and similar references. I put great store on public opinion of this type. this has never happened before, no other girls with whom I have wiled away an evening has ever been so singularly commented on, either favorably or unfavorably. the strange thing is that several of the fellows said what a nice personality she had, and yet I am positive that she spoke not a word to any of them. G who became very drunk and tried to engage her in conversation from time to time was quite dumfounded when she replied to his extensive sentences with only a word or two.
I'm getting a trifle sick of this letter. Suffice it to say that when I left her unravished on her doorstep Saturday morning I had resolved to terminate our passionate relationship. Now,
however, due to the very favorable comments by my fellow men and also having sufficient time to look back on the evening in retrospect, I have decided to try to extend our ardent friendship by asking her to the Chi. Club Easter Dance. I will ask her in an impromptu letter about 2 or 3 weeks before the dance. She should accept, but there is no telling what will happen by then, however we did part as the "best of friends".
H got 5 100s on 5 final exams. the 6th he isn't sure about. Wouldn't it be awful if he pulled a 98?
I see S discreetly failed to mention whether or not I was "drunk" in her letter. Her failure to mention my supposed condition doesn't leave much doubt as to their path of conjecture does it? Oh well, I always wanted to be notorious.
I've got to sell some sandwiches now, and I don't think I'll reread this. I've probably forgot a lot of what I was going to say, but I've already said enough.
Write me all the news.
Bob
There's a lot to be said in this letter. I'll probably forget most of it before I get through.
The fellow next door, inspired by your Ivy magazine about Frisbee which I showed him, brought 2 wimpleplots with him when he came back from Xmas. A couple of days later about seven revelers were cavorting with the wimpleplots in the 4th floor corridor. The were perceived by the 4th floor prefect and were unceremoniously ejected from the hall. This meant that they had to leave the hall at 6AM each morning and return at 12AM each night until further notice. They were in exile for two days. I don't think Frisbee is going to go over too big down here. Maybe we are deemphasizing sports, I don't know. At any rate, the exiled became ensanguine martyrs, and clandestine plans are being formed for springtime Frisbee meets with Lyons hall. What will come of this I don't know. It has already gotten beyond me.
My grades are about the same. I guess I've hit my peak. The Dean's list 88 is a good three points above my 85 ( a mark in which I am becoming entrenched with each passing semester).
At Carmel everything was 90. Here everything is 85. What a rut!
Your letter to P was quite (and here I am at a decided loss for an adequate word). It was expressive of fond emotion, unique, and a definite departure from our usual conservative habits or perhaps it wasn't. We both seem to be making severe departures from out usual conservative habits as of late; e,g, the fatal phone call.
If she's smart, she won't answer it. With this in mind, I am sure you have received an answer by now. I can't see how she can answer it and not place herself at a disadvantage in doing so; however, most girls, being mediocre logicians at best can't resist retorting to such a letter unless it frightened her, but then P doesn't scare easily. Your pointed reference to the abnormal and undesirable cell division and reorientation of her latter extremities should excite her curiosity if nothing else. The more I look at your letter the more sure I am that you will receive an answer, at least a summons. But enough of P for P has enough of butt.
I took MM out last Friday and had a reasonable time. As usual she was taciturn, but not as much as usual.
The evening was a debacle in some respects, but Bart....., you remember him and his cool music, pulled it out of the fire. He's a good organizer and I'm glad I doubled with him. Because of G, we were and hour late, and there were no tables when we finally arrived. Bart, somehow found one somewhere and bribed the waiter for another one. Our group on the whole was very lively and a good time was available to all who extended themselves a bit. As usual, I don't know if MM had a good time or not.
If you are still writing to S, you can probably find out more than I can. Those two are thick as thieves. That much I found out. The one point in the evening at which MM showed some definite interest in what I was saying occurred thusly.
Bob: "Tom told me in his last letter that he wrote S"
MM: "Yes, I know"
Bob: "He said that .. ah..ah... lets see..ah"
MM: !!! "Yes" !!!
Her interested tone startled me, and I immediatetly threw up my defenses and withdrew from the subject. I found out a little more about her and S too. They are both going to attend Clark College. Of course you know where that is. Just in case you might have forgotten, it is located in Dubuque, IA and is affiliated with Loras the same way that St. Mary's is affiliated with ND.
When I asked MM how long her Home Econ course would take she blatantly replied that you could stay as long as you wanted, and she didn't really care if she got a degree or not. She is then, a typical female college student taking her pre-marital course and the sooner she graduates the better.
I personally was not overly impressed; however, and this did surprise me, when I got back to ND about 15 of my close friends who were at the dance and who got a good look at MM questioned me as to where and how I found such a "pretty little number", and if I was "going steady" with her, and similar references. I put great store on public opinion of this type. this has never happened before, no other girls with whom I have wiled away an evening has ever been so singularly commented on, either favorably or unfavorably. the strange thing is that several of the fellows said what a nice personality she had, and yet I am positive that she spoke not a word to any of them. G who became very drunk and tried to engage her in conversation from time to time was quite dumfounded when she replied to his extensive sentences with only a word or two.
I'm getting a trifle sick of this letter. Suffice it to say that when I left her unravished on her doorstep Saturday morning I had resolved to terminate our passionate relationship. Now,
however, due to the very favorable comments by my fellow men and also having sufficient time to look back on the evening in retrospect, I have decided to try to extend our ardent friendship by asking her to the Chi. Club Easter Dance. I will ask her in an impromptu letter about 2 or 3 weeks before the dance. She should accept, but there is no telling what will happen by then, however we did part as the "best of friends".
H got 5 100s on 5 final exams. the 6th he isn't sure about. Wouldn't it be awful if he pulled a 98?
I see S discreetly failed to mention whether or not I was "drunk" in her letter. Her failure to mention my supposed condition doesn't leave much doubt as to their path of conjecture does it? Oh well, I always wanted to be notorious.
I've got to sell some sandwiches now, and I don't think I'll reread this. I've probably forgot a lot of what I was going to say, but I've already said enough.
Write me all the news.
Bob
Monday, January 14, 2013
Jan. 22, 1958
Dear Thomb,
Your copy of The Dartmouth with the confirmation of Howard's existence in it was extremely well received. The Hard Core president said, and I quote: "That's the neatest piece of shit I seen in a long time." This is a compliment in case you're wondering. After I showed it to the H.C., I posted it on the bulletin board where it was viewed with rousing cheers, etc. Everyone now claims to remember seeing you while you were here. The Hall Council is considering making you an honorary hall member, a tribute which has never been made before. Let me know next time you intend to drop in and we'll have a testimonial dinner in your honor, or something fitting and suitable like that.
Last Friday (1-16-58) N.D. cancelled classes for the first time in 30 years on account of inclement weather. Not only that, but they cancelled classes Saturday also. Since then more of my professors have failed to show up then have shown up. Five of my last six classes were called off due to absent professors.
There is more that I could say but finals start tomorrow and I've go to start doing something.
I'm going to the semester dance in Chicago. Getting fixed up. Also going to a party on the following nite. Getting fixed up for that too. Different girls. It's about time too. I'm not too horny.
Das ist alles.
Bobo
Your copy of The Dartmouth with the confirmation of Howard's existence in it was extremely well received. The Hard Core president said, and I quote: "That's the neatest piece of shit I seen in a long time." This is a compliment in case you're wondering. After I showed it to the H.C., I posted it on the bulletin board where it was viewed with rousing cheers, etc. Everyone now claims to remember seeing you while you were here. The Hall Council is considering making you an honorary hall member, a tribute which has never been made before. Let me know next time you intend to drop in and we'll have a testimonial dinner in your honor, or something fitting and suitable like that.
Last Friday (1-16-58) N.D. cancelled classes for the first time in 30 years on account of inclement weather. Not only that, but they cancelled classes Saturday also. Since then more of my professors have failed to show up then have shown up. Five of my last six classes were called off due to absent professors.
There is more that I could say but finals start tomorrow and I've go to start doing something.
I'm going to the semester dance in Chicago. Getting fixed up. Also going to a party on the following nite. Getting fixed up for that too. Different girls. It's about time too. I'm not too horny.
Das ist alles.
Bobo
Sunday, December 30, 2012
Jan. 19, 1958
Dear Bob,
Your decision to use "MM" in your letters I find most commendable. I'm sure she and all her
descendents will be ever indebted to you. This action is another example of the discretion I have found so typical in all your actions.
My intended Winter Carnival date never answered my letter, so Bob, my next door neighbor, a brother, and a Montanan, is fixing me up with someone from home who goes to Smith in Mass. She'll probably show up with boots, a ten gallon hat, a gun on each hip and call me "pardner" the entire weekend.
And what "drunken mob" propositioned me over the phone? If you mean S et al, they welcomed in the New Year, S assured me with cokes. And I have never been propositioned in my life, alas,
As far as your academy award phone call is concerned, S said in her letter that she was sure J wasn't drunk, and she didn't think I was drunk. No mention was made of you. I suggest you avoid the subject of liquor when MM comes up later this week.
The weather here has been wintry, and today is the first time in five days we haven't had snow. There is about two feet of it on the ground now.
My finals start Wednesday, and my last one is next Tuesday. Then comes Carnival.
I'll be looking for a letter from you early next week when you can tell me how the 24th and the 25th went.
Tom
Your decision to use "MM" in your letters I find most commendable. I'm sure she and all her
descendents will be ever indebted to you. This action is another example of the discretion I have found so typical in all your actions.
My intended Winter Carnival date never answered my letter, so Bob, my next door neighbor, a brother, and a Montanan, is fixing me up with someone from home who goes to Smith in Mass. She'll probably show up with boots, a ten gallon hat, a gun on each hip and call me "pardner" the entire weekend.
And what "drunken mob" propositioned me over the phone? If you mean S et al, they welcomed in the New Year, S assured me with cokes. And I have never been propositioned in my life, alas,
As far as your academy award phone call is concerned, S said in her letter that she was sure J wasn't drunk, and she didn't think I was drunk. No mention was made of you. I suggest you avoid the subject of liquor when MM comes up later this week.
The weather here has been wintry, and today is the first time in five days we haven't had snow. There is about two feet of it on the ground now.
My finals start Wednesday, and my last one is next Tuesday. Then comes Carnival.
I'll be looking for a letter from you early next week when you can tell me how the 24th and the 25th went.
Tom
Tuesday, December 18, 2012
Jan. 16, 1958
Dear Thom,
I have just now finished a carefully phrased letter to M, henceforth to be referred to as MM, for purposes of convenience and future concealment when these letters are eventually published.
Again I am forced to depend on G for transportation to and from the dance. Wait until I win my Thunderbird.
Have you decided on you date for the Vinter Karnival yet? Also, have you received any letters from that drunken mob that was propositioning you over the phone?
I have been reading your copy of the "Dirtmouth" and it occurred to me that you should begin to carefully eye the "61s" on the staff, if you hope to prevent a similar "bloody coup" come next May. Don't forget you may be the night editor on duty who gets to speak the immortal words, "Gnarmmpht Selzerrnicque" as they carry you away.
In deference to you I am listening to "Gunsmoke". It does not sound especially interesting, but then again it's not too bad.
The dance is the night of the 24th. If all goes well, I may take her out on the 25th also; However, after my academy award winning phone call, I may be reading chess books or popping corn on the night of the 24th. "Gunsmoke" has ended with the usual volley of shots and demise of the villain. Dillon, cleverly using Chester to do all the dirty work, emerged unscathed, philosophizing all over the place.
I was caught yelling in the hallways and have to see the Rector. Aren't you sorry you didn't go to a pro-Christ school?
Bob
"Duetschland ueber alles"
I have just now finished a carefully phrased letter to M, henceforth to be referred to as MM, for purposes of convenience and future concealment when these letters are eventually published.
Again I am forced to depend on G for transportation to and from the dance. Wait until I win my Thunderbird.
Have you decided on you date for the Vinter Karnival yet? Also, have you received any letters from that drunken mob that was propositioning you over the phone?
I have been reading your copy of the "Dirtmouth" and it occurred to me that you should begin to carefully eye the "61s" on the staff, if you hope to prevent a similar "bloody coup" come next May. Don't forget you may be the night editor on duty who gets to speak the immortal words, "Gnarmmpht Selzerrnicque" as they carry you away.
In deference to you I am listening to "Gunsmoke". It does not sound especially interesting, but then again it's not too bad.
The dance is the night of the 24th. If all goes well, I may take her out on the 25th also; However, after my academy award winning phone call, I may be reading chess books or popping corn on the night of the 24th. "Gunsmoke" has ended with the usual volley of shots and demise of the villain. Dillon, cleverly using Chester to do all the dirty work, emerged unscathed, philosophizing all over the place.
I was caught yelling in the hallways and have to see the Rector. Aren't you sorry you didn't go to a pro-Christ school?
Bob
"Duetschland ueber alles"
Friday, November 30, 2012
Jan. 12, 1958
Dear Bob,
Once more this observer is writing from the fabled playground of the East, New Hampshire, and as I look out my window this early Sunday afternoon, a not uncommon sight is a gaily-clad person skiing down the sidewalk in the direction of the golf course ski tow. We have six inches of snow on the ground, and temperatures well below freezing.
Such weather, as you might guess, doesn't exactly encourage Frisbee contests, so I've had to turn elsewhere for entertainment. I've found it mainly in playing whist a game in which I'm unfortunately losing much money.
The other day, short on money, I decided to find a less expensive method of wasting time, so one of the fellows down the hall and I decided to construct icicles. We finally ended up constructing an elaborate system of troughs and tubing for conveying water from the faucet in the john out the window, down a rope reaching from the fourth floor to the ground. Since the temperature was well below zero, we soon had an icicle four stories in length and of a considerable diameter. Unfortunately, the rope was unable to support the weight, and when we inspected our fully-automatic icicle machine in the morning we found the icicle forming a huge mound of ice on the ground. We used so much ingenuity in making our icicle machine that I feel I am wasting my time in liberal arts.
I wrote S a letter last week, but I'm afraid I tried to "snow" her too much. I told her what a nice time I had, etc. and then asked her to go see the Dartmouth Glee Club concert in Chicago if I get home for spring vacation. I received a letter from her last Thursday, and while it wasn't spectacular it was promising. You may construe that as you like.
Anyway, she accepted my invitation, and now all I have to do is get home.
Fortunately (unfortunately?) I haven't been pining away about her, for I can't remember what she looks like, but I asked her to send me a picture, so fond, torturing memories may be returning very shortly. My finals start a week from Wednesday, so I probably won't write again 'til after Carnival. I've invited that girl from Cortland College in N.Y., but she hasn't answered yet. She must be of the leave-them-hanging-by-the-thumbs school.
With radiator hissing, this reporter bids you fond farewell from this winter wonderland.
Tom
Once more this observer is writing from the fabled playground of the East, New Hampshire, and as I look out my window this early Sunday afternoon, a not uncommon sight is a gaily-clad person skiing down the sidewalk in the direction of the golf course ski tow. We have six inches of snow on the ground, and temperatures well below freezing.
Such weather, as you might guess, doesn't exactly encourage Frisbee contests, so I've had to turn elsewhere for entertainment. I've found it mainly in playing whist a game in which I'm unfortunately losing much money.
The other day, short on money, I decided to find a less expensive method of wasting time, so one of the fellows down the hall and I decided to construct icicles. We finally ended up constructing an elaborate system of troughs and tubing for conveying water from the faucet in the john out the window, down a rope reaching from the fourth floor to the ground. Since the temperature was well below zero, we soon had an icicle four stories in length and of a considerable diameter. Unfortunately, the rope was unable to support the weight, and when we inspected our fully-automatic icicle machine in the morning we found the icicle forming a huge mound of ice on the ground. We used so much ingenuity in making our icicle machine that I feel I am wasting my time in liberal arts.
I wrote S a letter last week, but I'm afraid I tried to "snow" her too much. I told her what a nice time I had, etc. and then asked her to go see the Dartmouth Glee Club concert in Chicago if I get home for spring vacation. I received a letter from her last Thursday, and while it wasn't spectacular it was promising. You may construe that as you like.
Anyway, she accepted my invitation, and now all I have to do is get home.
Fortunately (unfortunately?) I haven't been pining away about her, for I can't remember what she looks like, but I asked her to send me a picture, so fond, torturing memories may be returning very shortly. My finals start a week from Wednesday, so I probably won't write again 'til after Carnival. I've invited that girl from Cortland College in N.Y., but she hasn't answered yet. She must be of the leave-them-hanging-by-the-thumbs school.
With radiator hissing, this reporter bids you fond farewell from this winter wonderland.
Tom
Saturday, November 17, 2012
Dec. 12, 1967
Dear Thom,
Your last letter on Eastern sadism as it is practiced at Dartmouth moved me deeply, although I imagine it moved you much more deeply. I fail to realize why man's inhumanity to man must continue; however I suppose out of such practices the seeds of tradition spring. I trust your days of torture are over.
I am going to work for the P.O. this year I think, I have to go into the main P.O. in Chicago this Saturday (14th) for an interview - - 7 bucks shot on train fare.
The tests are still coming thick and fast. They are going to screw me before Christmas or die trying.
Time to go to breakfast. I'll finish when I come back. Got to put on my Engineer boots - - 8 inches of new snow.
- - Breakfast- -
I have returned across the barren wastes of the quadrangle to complete this letter.
Joke of the week:
Russia's latest attempt to be first in everything. They are going to put three live cows in their next satellite.
It will be the first herd shot round the world.
I'll be home for x'mas.
Bob
Your last letter on Eastern sadism as it is practiced at Dartmouth moved me deeply, although I imagine it moved you much more deeply. I fail to realize why man's inhumanity to man must continue; however I suppose out of such practices the seeds of tradition spring. I trust your days of torture are over.
I am going to work for the P.O. this year I think, I have to go into the main P.O. in Chicago this Saturday (14th) for an interview - - 7 bucks shot on train fare.
The tests are still coming thick and fast. They are going to screw me before Christmas or die trying.
Time to go to breakfast. I'll finish when I come back. Got to put on my Engineer boots - - 8 inches of new snow.
- - Breakfast- -
I have returned across the barren wastes of the quadrangle to complete this letter.
Joke of the week:
Russia's latest attempt to be first in everything. They are going to put three live cows in their next satellite.
It will be the first herd shot round the world.
I'll be home for x'mas.
Bob
Sunday, November 11, 2012
Dec. 1, 1957
Dear Bob,
How the mighty have fallen! First we and then Oklahoma! What's the world coming to? I suppose the nodamners were very happy to have pulled the upset of the year. There was black crepe paper hanging everywhere on our campus that weekend. Maybe next year.
In your last letter you mentioned the song "Peggy Sue", is that the one that goes:
"Peggy Sue
I'd like to conjugate with you"?
Your last letter was very entertaining. I noticed the cardboard cylinder containing it only when I was on my way to my sociology hour exam, and, not realizing its length, I started reading it.
I was five minutes late for the exam.
Speaking of being late for exams, I pulled a real boner last week for my economics exam; I thought it was to start at 7:30 when it really began at 7. I walked in at 7:25, and my prof rushed up to me with a sick(ening?) look on his face and asked me what had happened. Taken
askance, I asked him what the hell right he had to start the exam without me. He quickly apologized, and at the same time he offered to give me some extra time; but not to obligate myself to him I refused and finished the exam in thirty-five minutes. I'm dying to see my mark!
Speaking of death and related topics, I would suggest that you desist from rolling up your
voluminous letters until they resemble a cigarette unless you are o the opinion that your
unexpected death would result in your joining the heavenly choirs as a scroll-roller.
I'm sorry to hear that you have been so influenced by the School of Economics that you think nothing of defacing the very premises in which you live. Such is the corrosive power of greed.
Last Monday night was Hell Night at my fraternity. By virtue of my having endured that evening, I am now in a position to assume the full responsibilities and privileges of a brother next week at our initiation.
We were forced to do different things on Hell Night - - mostly things of a degrading nature. We (twenty-two of us pledges) had to sit in a very small room (its name will give you some indication of its size; it's called the Maidenhead.) and smoke cheap cigars for about twenty minutes.
We then had to disrobe down to our shorts and had to crawl on our hands and knees all through the house while the sadistic brothers used paddles to prod us along. We had to crawl on our hands and knees up two flights of stairs, and then we had to swallow a couple of pills which were supposed to make us piss green for two days. Evidently I didn't take enough pills for I have noticed no unusual reactions. My eyeballs turned green, but that's a usual reaction at this time of year - - the Christmas season.
We then had to crawl down into the basement and there received more abuses, e.g. voice standing in back of bright light . "Do you love the brothers?" Feather-covered pledge sitting on cake of ice while someone pours cold water down his back: "No, No, No!" Voice, etc. "You ungrateful son-of-a bitch!" followed quickly by cold and hot water alternately. Voice etc. reiterates question. Feather-covered etc: "Yes, Yes, Yes!!" voice etc: "Hey guys look, we've got a fairy in the house!!"
Returning once more to civilization, I spent Thanksgiving vacation in a Cistercian monastery in
Spencer, Mass. I have not, am not, and will not consider becoming a monk. The monastery was nice to take a tour through, but I wouldn't want to live there.
I should get home for Christmas on the 15th and will be looking forward to seeing you soon thereafter.
Tom
P.S. I have enclosed an article from "Ivy Magazine" thinking you might like to be the Frisbee organizer on your campus.
How the mighty have fallen! First we and then Oklahoma! What's the world coming to? I suppose the nodamners were very happy to have pulled the upset of the year. There was black crepe paper hanging everywhere on our campus that weekend. Maybe next year.
In your last letter you mentioned the song "Peggy Sue", is that the one that goes:
"Peggy Sue
I'd like to conjugate with you"?
Your last letter was very entertaining. I noticed the cardboard cylinder containing it only when I was on my way to my sociology hour exam, and, not realizing its length, I started reading it.
I was five minutes late for the exam.
Speaking of being late for exams, I pulled a real boner last week for my economics exam; I thought it was to start at 7:30 when it really began at 7. I walked in at 7:25, and my prof rushed up to me with a sick(ening?) look on his face and asked me what had happened. Taken
askance, I asked him what the hell right he had to start the exam without me. He quickly apologized, and at the same time he offered to give me some extra time; but not to obligate myself to him I refused and finished the exam in thirty-five minutes. I'm dying to see my mark!
Speaking of death and related topics, I would suggest that you desist from rolling up your
voluminous letters until they resemble a cigarette unless you are o the opinion that your
unexpected death would result in your joining the heavenly choirs as a scroll-roller.
I'm sorry to hear that you have been so influenced by the School of Economics that you think nothing of defacing the very premises in which you live. Such is the corrosive power of greed.
Last Monday night was Hell Night at my fraternity. By virtue of my having endured that evening, I am now in a position to assume the full responsibilities and privileges of a brother next week at our initiation.
We were forced to do different things on Hell Night - - mostly things of a degrading nature. We (twenty-two of us pledges) had to sit in a very small room (its name will give you some indication of its size; it's called the Maidenhead.) and smoke cheap cigars for about twenty minutes.
We then had to disrobe down to our shorts and had to crawl on our hands and knees all through the house while the sadistic brothers used paddles to prod us along. We had to crawl on our hands and knees up two flights of stairs, and then we had to swallow a couple of pills which were supposed to make us piss green for two days. Evidently I didn't take enough pills for I have noticed no unusual reactions. My eyeballs turned green, but that's a usual reaction at this time of year - - the Christmas season.
We then had to crawl down into the basement and there received more abuses, e.g. voice standing in back of bright light . "Do you love the brothers?" Feather-covered pledge sitting on cake of ice while someone pours cold water down his back: "No, No, No!" Voice, etc. "You ungrateful son-of-a bitch!" followed quickly by cold and hot water alternately. Voice etc. reiterates question. Feather-covered etc: "Yes, Yes, Yes!!" voice etc: "Hey guys look, we've got a fairy in the house!!"
Returning once more to civilization, I spent Thanksgiving vacation in a Cistercian monastery in
Spencer, Mass. I have not, am not, and will not consider becoming a monk. The monastery was nice to take a tour through, but I wouldn't want to live there.
I should get home for Christmas on the 15th and will be looking forward to seeing you soon thereafter.
Tom
P.S. I have enclosed an article from "Ivy Magazine" thinking you might like to be the Frisbee organizer on your campus.
Saturday, November 10, 2012
Nov. 18, 1957 (Continued)
As if that wasn't enough, the administration is on my neck because of the signs I put up on the face of the hall on football weekends (home games).
I was merely trying to actively compete with the other halls for the money of the irrational consumers, but they (the administration) felt that a sign 16 ft. long and 8 ft. wide demanding that
one and all "Eat Here" in bright vermillion letters was carrying the profit motive too far, especially since it was accompanied by 3 lesser signs, "We Give Green Stamps", "Eat at Howard Hall", and "Recommended by Duncan Hines", each 8 ft. by 4 ft. and in various colors.
After the Pitt game, I was given a blunt note to the effect that I must never erect an edifice of that nature again.
Well you can imagine their consternation when I put the same signs up for the Navy game
(I'm not in Commerce for nothing).
I have just now received another note threatening dire things if I stage another performance for the Iowas game this Saturday. I have not yet decided what to do.
As you can see I have been very busy, what with fighting the administration, the hall council, the fauna indigenous to the 4th floor, and the elements (It was 45 degrees in my room at 5:00 A.M. this morning). I'm going to have to weather strip the windows.
As for P. I wrote her one letter which she answered. I wrote her another letter which she did not answer. From this I must assume that I am no longer an integral part of her life (ho, ho that's a good one).
If you can think of a good reason for writing to her, I suggest you do so, if you are still interested in her. I feel that you will meet with better success than I did.
In my last letter to her I implied that because of my business commitments (sandwich concession) I would be unable to enjoy her company down here. This may have influenced her
decision to terminate our correspondence.
However, I don't think this is the case. I believe she merely found greener pastures. I still think very highly of her; in fact I was about to declare that she indeed was "the Indies" when unfortunately the friendly natives began making hostile overtures.
What I want to find is a girl who will at least write and tell me that she is no longer going to write to me. It is unnerving to be abruptly cut off.
As I have stated before, I feel she is rather found of you. The chief reason for this is that you ignore her on occasions, such as fooling with K in the water and disregarding P, also you
tease her consistently while I on the other hand do everything I can to patronize her. The result of this is, I believe, that she has fathomed me completely while she cannot quite figure you out. She naturally is interested in discovering if you really like her or not. This thought came to me
last night. I may be way off base, but right now is sounds pretty good. however, for all I know
she might be pushing a baby carriage by now.
I have been three days in writing this letter. I think I'm about done. Parts of this may not make sense. I.m not going to reread it. It's too damn long.
No, we didn't get any snow down here when Chicago did. We haven't had any snow yet, except for one day.
I guess that's about all. I'll try to write more often.
In summing up the "P" situation I suggest you write. If she is not going steady or worse, you
should score.
I have to get a new pen.
Bob
I was merely trying to actively compete with the other halls for the money of the irrational consumers, but they (the administration) felt that a sign 16 ft. long and 8 ft. wide demanding that
one and all "Eat Here" in bright vermillion letters was carrying the profit motive too far, especially since it was accompanied by 3 lesser signs, "We Give Green Stamps", "Eat at Howard Hall", and "Recommended by Duncan Hines", each 8 ft. by 4 ft. and in various colors.
After the Pitt game, I was given a blunt note to the effect that I must never erect an edifice of that nature again.
Well you can imagine their consternation when I put the same signs up for the Navy game
(I'm not in Commerce for nothing).
I have just now received another note threatening dire things if I stage another performance for the Iowas game this Saturday. I have not yet decided what to do.
As you can see I have been very busy, what with fighting the administration, the hall council, the fauna indigenous to the 4th floor, and the elements (It was 45 degrees in my room at 5:00 A.M. this morning). I'm going to have to weather strip the windows.
As for P. I wrote her one letter which she answered. I wrote her another letter which she did not answer. From this I must assume that I am no longer an integral part of her life (ho, ho that's a good one).
If you can think of a good reason for writing to her, I suggest you do so, if you are still interested in her. I feel that you will meet with better success than I did.
In my last letter to her I implied that because of my business commitments (sandwich concession) I would be unable to enjoy her company down here. This may have influenced her
decision to terminate our correspondence.
However, I don't think this is the case. I believe she merely found greener pastures. I still think very highly of her; in fact I was about to declare that she indeed was "the Indies" when unfortunately the friendly natives began making hostile overtures.
What I want to find is a girl who will at least write and tell me that she is no longer going to write to me. It is unnerving to be abruptly cut off.
As I have stated before, I feel she is rather found of you. The chief reason for this is that you ignore her on occasions, such as fooling with K in the water and disregarding P, also you
tease her consistently while I on the other hand do everything I can to patronize her. The result of this is, I believe, that she has fathomed me completely while she cannot quite figure you out. She naturally is interested in discovering if you really like her or not. This thought came to me
last night. I may be way off base, but right now is sounds pretty good. however, for all I know
she might be pushing a baby carriage by now.
I have been three days in writing this letter. I think I'm about done. Parts of this may not make sense. I.m not going to reread it. It's too damn long.
No, we didn't get any snow down here when Chicago did. We haven't had any snow yet, except for one day.
I guess that's about all. I'll try to write more often.
In summing up the "P" situation I suggest you write. If she is not going steady or worse, you
should score.
I have to get a new pen.
Bob
Saturday, October 27, 2012
Nov. 18, 1957
Dear Thom,
I'm sorry about my dilatory corresponding, but I have been going around in circles for the past --
well since I wrote you last. I haven't written a letter in weeks. I assembled all the letters I have
received and not answered and picked the one with the earliest postmark. It was yours. Lucky
fellow.
So I am sitting here now at my desk listening to a very inspiring song entitled "Peggy Sue" I believe. Those are the only two words I can understand anyway. I have decided to drop the
Rock & Roll controversy. It's not worth arguing about.
The mid-terms had me going for a while, but they're all through now.
The hall council decided to investigate my books, and they discovered that no one could read them except me. Accusations were leveled. Counter accusations followed. Tempers flared (especially mine). The rector exploded, I was taken down several pegs and was thoroughly pissed-off. Things finally cooled off and then the hall auditor, the hall treasurer and I got together and devised a new accounting system. Actually the one I had was sufficient as they agreed after I explained it to them, but they felt that anyone should be able to read it. Now all is peaceful until the next time.
I spent one of the worst nights in my life several weeks ago. It all started at 5:00 P.M. that
afternoon. I was cleaning out the fish tank when I heard a noise in the corner of the room by the radiator. I turned my head in that direction and what do I see but a small rodent (i.e., a mouse) running towards me with its head down so it couldn't see me. I immediately demanded what the hell he meant by coming in without knocking, in response to my query he did a rapid about face and sped for the radiator. Throwing caution to the wind, I pursued him with intent to kill. Alas, he had vanished. I located his hole, but, thinking that I had left an indelible impression of fear on generations of yet unborn mice, I did not think he would return.
That night I returned to the room after the lights had gone out and lit a candle. I immediately sensed something was wrong. I felt I was not alone. There was no one under my bed much to my relief and no one in it either much to my dismay (occasionally I have my horny moments).
I undressed, put my P.J.s on, brushed my teeth, blew out the candle, climbed into bed.
all was quiet, too quiet. I swear i could feel that mouse in the very atmosphere of the room. I waited, then I heard him. Scra-a-a-ach, Scra-a-a-ach, Scre-e-e-ech.
It was a truly horrible sound, I assure you.
I waited until I heard him in the corner of the room opposite the radiator. When I felt I could beat him to his hole, I grabbed my pen light, leaped out of bed and dashed for the radiator. I won by several lengths. He retreated to a neutral corner. I stuffed his hole with Kleenex and Duco cement (a fiendish, gooy cement).
I then went next door and enlisted the help of 3 stalwart hunters. It was 11:20 P.M. when we returned to my room
We piled all the movable furniture on my bed or out in the corridor and then began our not -too-systemic search.
The mouse was discovered, chased, lost, discovered, chased, lost, discovered, etc.
At 12:22 one of my confederates wounded him with a saber-thrust of my U.S. navy surplus sheath knife. He (he being the mouse limped away roaring in pain. We followed the pools of blood across the room and found him lying on his side under my bed. As we closed in, he reared upon his hind legs and screamed his defiance, but from the way he was coughing up blood we knew he was through. We rushed him from all sides and two spear trusts later it was all over. His guts littered the floor.
The actual slayer and his exuberant roommate picked the valiant warrior up by his tail and ran off to show him to the world at 12:30 in the morning. From the howls and screams emitting from the various rooms far down the corridor, I knew they were being warmly received wherever they appeared with their prize.
I'm sorry about my dilatory corresponding, but I have been going around in circles for the past --
well since I wrote you last. I haven't written a letter in weeks. I assembled all the letters I have
received and not answered and picked the one with the earliest postmark. It was yours. Lucky
fellow.
So I am sitting here now at my desk listening to a very inspiring song entitled "Peggy Sue" I believe. Those are the only two words I can understand anyway. I have decided to drop the
Rock & Roll controversy. It's not worth arguing about.
The mid-terms had me going for a while, but they're all through now.
The hall council decided to investigate my books, and they discovered that no one could read them except me. Accusations were leveled. Counter accusations followed. Tempers flared (especially mine). The rector exploded, I was taken down several pegs and was thoroughly pissed-off. Things finally cooled off and then the hall auditor, the hall treasurer and I got together and devised a new accounting system. Actually the one I had was sufficient as they agreed after I explained it to them, but they felt that anyone should be able to read it. Now all is peaceful until the next time.
I spent one of the worst nights in my life several weeks ago. It all started at 5:00 P.M. that
afternoon. I was cleaning out the fish tank when I heard a noise in the corner of the room by the radiator. I turned my head in that direction and what do I see but a small rodent (i.e., a mouse) running towards me with its head down so it couldn't see me. I immediately demanded what the hell he meant by coming in without knocking, in response to my query he did a rapid about face and sped for the radiator. Throwing caution to the wind, I pursued him with intent to kill. Alas, he had vanished. I located his hole, but, thinking that I had left an indelible impression of fear on generations of yet unborn mice, I did not think he would return.
That night I returned to the room after the lights had gone out and lit a candle. I immediately sensed something was wrong. I felt I was not alone. There was no one under my bed much to my relief and no one in it either much to my dismay (occasionally I have my horny moments).
I undressed, put my P.J.s on, brushed my teeth, blew out the candle, climbed into bed.
all was quiet, too quiet. I swear i could feel that mouse in the very atmosphere of the room. I waited, then I heard him. Scra-a-a-ach, Scra-a-a-ach, Scre-e-e-ech.
It was a truly horrible sound, I assure you.
I waited until I heard him in the corner of the room opposite the radiator. When I felt I could beat him to his hole, I grabbed my pen light, leaped out of bed and dashed for the radiator. I won by several lengths. He retreated to a neutral corner. I stuffed his hole with Kleenex and Duco cement (a fiendish, gooy cement).
I then went next door and enlisted the help of 3 stalwart hunters. It was 11:20 P.M. when we returned to my room
We piled all the movable furniture on my bed or out in the corridor and then began our not -too-systemic search.
The mouse was discovered, chased, lost, discovered, chased, lost, discovered, etc.
At 12:22 one of my confederates wounded him with a saber-thrust of my U.S. navy surplus sheath knife. He (he being the mouse limped away roaring in pain. We followed the pools of blood across the room and found him lying on his side under my bed. As we closed in, he reared upon his hind legs and screamed his defiance, but from the way he was coughing up blood we knew he was through. We rushed him from all sides and two spear trusts later it was all over. His guts littered the floor.
The actual slayer and his exuberant roommate picked the valiant warrior up by his tail and ran off to show him to the world at 12:30 in the morning. From the howls and screams emitting from the various rooms far down the corridor, I knew they were being warmly received wherever they appeared with their prize.
Saturday, October 6, 2012
Oct. 27, 1957
Dear Bob,
I hope you don't mind my answering your letter letter so soon, but I have a few extra hours today and thought I might as well write to you.
In reference to the subject which comprised a great part of your last letter, I am enclosing a piece from "The New Yorker". /Underlined in the article is the following: "It has strong melodic lines and a compelling sense of propulsion, and these virtues are, after all, the basic virtues of
genuine music."/ I assume you have read it and are objecting that it merely supports your side of the argument. But wait! You may have noticed the phrase "strong sense of melodic lines."
Not "line", Can you recall any r.& r song which has melodic lines? (we will assume for the sake
of argument that every r.& r. song has a melodic line).
And pray tell what sense of propulsion does one feel when listening to a r.& r. song? Certainly one is moving but in a very restrained circle. "Propulsion" connotes a change of place and in the case of music, a metamorphosis, even a catharsis.
I will conclude my dissertation on the subject by asking you a question: What emotions other than abhorrence and disgust, does r.& r. evoke?
Have you done anything about P. lately? By that I mean have you written her or asked her up for a weekend? One of us has to keep in touch with her so that we'll have at least three for
cards next summer.
Unfortunately, despite much diligent searching, I am unable to add to this letter a suitable
versified epilogue, but I will try to get a good one for my next letter.
Tom
I hope you don't mind my answering your letter letter so soon, but I have a few extra hours today and thought I might as well write to you.
In reference to the subject which comprised a great part of your last letter, I am enclosing a piece from "The New Yorker". /Underlined in the article is the following: "It has strong melodic lines and a compelling sense of propulsion, and these virtues are, after all, the basic virtues of
genuine music."/ I assume you have read it and are objecting that it merely supports your side of the argument. But wait! You may have noticed the phrase "strong sense of melodic lines."
Not "line", Can you recall any r.& r song which has melodic lines? (we will assume for the sake
of argument that every r.& r. song has a melodic line).
And pray tell what sense of propulsion does one feel when listening to a r.& r. song? Certainly one is moving but in a very restrained circle. "Propulsion" connotes a change of place and in the case of music, a metamorphosis, even a catharsis.
I will conclude my dissertation on the subject by asking you a question: What emotions other than abhorrence and disgust, does r.& r. evoke?
Have you done anything about P. lately? By that I mean have you written her or asked her up for a weekend? One of us has to keep in touch with her so that we'll have at least three for
cards next summer.
Unfortunately, despite much diligent searching, I am unable to add to this letter a suitable
versified epilogue, but I will try to get a good one for my next letter.
Tom
Wednesday, September 26, 2012
Oct. 22, 1957
Dear Tom,
See here now! By your own testimony you have convicted yourself. Rock and Roll is a form of
art, of sound in time, which expresses ideas and emotions in significant forms through the
elements of rhythm, melody, harmony and color. Your efforts to "avoid insulting my intelligence"
by showing me how R.&R. violates everyone of these ideas merely seems an attempt on your part to get out of a difficult argument which could prove your undoing. Remember you said that
R.& R. violates every one of the above mentioned principles. to begin with R.& R. is a form of
sound in time. It has a very basic rhythm to it, sort of a "thump-thump-thump all the way through
each song. It cerainly expresses emotions though they be very basic ones. These two points are the most obvious ones which you claimed R.& R. does not possess. I feel certain that I could take my dictionary and look up the definition of each point you mentioned in your
definition of music and show you that R.& R. in some way fulfills each requirement. However
I just realized who I was arguing with - - a master of double-entendre, persiflage, beating-
around-the-bush, attacking-wrong-end-of-argument-while-leading-opponent-to-believe-you-are-
both-talking-about-the-same-thing, changing the.subject, and avoiding the question.
In all of our arguments either I have agreed with you or else the question was never resolved.
This is not an attack on your character but rather an exasperated admission that I never
yet have been able to change your mind on any subject. There is no point in my attempting
anything of that nature at this stage of the game.
I feel reasonable sure that your next letter will contain a calculated though irrational attack
on Rock and Roll as a form of music, as a threat to society, as a menace to the Catholic
Church, and as a seducer of young America. You will employ every tricky phrase at your
disposal ignoring every point I have made - - few though they be. I don't expect a reply on
the subject. I would have to employ a battery of logicians to keep up with your arguments.
I know enough to quit when I'm behind.
I'm glad to see that the good old Indians have bee so victorious on the gridiron (why do
they call it a gridiron?)
I hope you will be able to beat the Boys from the Yard next week.
The Sandwich Concession is coming along fine. I expect a big take next Saturday. G is
helping me now. He is a diligent worker, but what I like best about employing him is that
he plows his salary back into the business - - that is to say he takes his salary in food, a
good portion of it anyway. As I said before, I like a diligent worker.
That's all for now. Keep relaxing that kidney.
Bob
I may send you s Scholastic, I've got a few extras.
See here now! By your own testimony you have convicted yourself. Rock and Roll is a form of
art, of sound in time, which expresses ideas and emotions in significant forms through the
elements of rhythm, melody, harmony and color. Your efforts to "avoid insulting my intelligence"
by showing me how R.&R. violates everyone of these ideas merely seems an attempt on your part to get out of a difficult argument which could prove your undoing. Remember you said that
R.& R. violates every one of the above mentioned principles. to begin with R.& R. is a form of
sound in time. It has a very basic rhythm to it, sort of a "thump-thump-thump all the way through
each song. It cerainly expresses emotions though they be very basic ones. These two points are the most obvious ones which you claimed R.& R. does not possess. I feel certain that I could take my dictionary and look up the definition of each point you mentioned in your
definition of music and show you that R.& R. in some way fulfills each requirement. However
I just realized who I was arguing with - - a master of double-entendre, persiflage, beating-
around-the-bush, attacking-wrong-end-of-argument-while-leading-opponent-to-believe-you-are-
both-talking-about-the-same-thing, changing the.subject, and avoiding the question.
In all of our arguments either I have agreed with you or else the question was never resolved.
This is not an attack on your character but rather an exasperated admission that I never
yet have been able to change your mind on any subject. There is no point in my attempting
anything of that nature at this stage of the game.
I feel reasonable sure that your next letter will contain a calculated though irrational attack
on Rock and Roll as a form of music, as a threat to society, as a menace to the Catholic
Church, and as a seducer of young America. You will employ every tricky phrase at your
disposal ignoring every point I have made - - few though they be. I don't expect a reply on
the subject. I would have to employ a battery of logicians to keep up with your arguments.
I know enough to quit when I'm behind.
I'm glad to see that the good old Indians have bee so victorious on the gridiron (why do
they call it a gridiron?)
I hope you will be able to beat the Boys from the Yard next week.
The Sandwich Concession is coming along fine. I expect a big take next Saturday. G is
helping me now. He is a diligent worker, but what I like best about employing him is that
he plows his salary back into the business - - that is to say he takes his salary in food, a
good portion of it anyway. As I said before, I like a diligent worker.
That's all for now. Keep relaxing that kidney.
Bob
I may send you s Scholastic, I've got a few extras.
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